Life is an expectation

I was reading Parag’s blog and came across a post about expectations. I paste an excerpt directly from the reader feed (without his permission, sorry for that).

We take some people for granted. We make up a mind about how they are, how they behave, how they'll react and then we expect. Expectations is always the root cause of turbulence. I read a quote few days back which has stuck in my mind. Cause of all bad is ignorance and laziness.

Going back, when we have a certain getup of a person in mind, we make expectations of how they are. And when they cross those boundaries we feel they have done something that was at least not completely right, if not wrong.

Now that is very true, isn’t it? You can easily remember when someone crossed the boundaries but can you remember when you crossed the boundaries? As I was reading that post I remembered an incident which took place not quite long back. My dad, my soon to be father-in-law and I were sitting at our place that day. Somehow the topic of discussion turned to wedding anniversaries and I congratulated both of them for completing a combined more than half century years between them in their respective marriages. They started handing over tips to me in the talk and both mentioned that for a successful marriage or for that matter any successful relationship one needs to stop expecting. Where there are expectations there is bound to be disappointment at a point. Bitterness follows disappointment and dents a huge blow to the relationship. Lastly they concluded that not expecting is a very tough job as it comes to us naturally.

And Sam Walton had said
High expectations are the key to everything

I expect that all of you have a nice weekend :-)

I got engaged!!

Nice title for the first post of the year, isn’t it? Though like the last time I am not misleading anyone by the title :). By now most of you know and have seen the pics as well but well to let my blog know that on October 18^th (yeah I know I post quite late) I got engaged to Neha. We have been together in the same company for last two and half years now. Yep, I know I have to take back my words from that last post on people working in same company and getting married :-). But it has been a fun ride till now… the entire secret love affair thing and hiding it from other colleagues, confronting parents with the news of intentions to get married when they were thinking of other marriage proposals, being a good boy in front of in-laws (well I am good but you know..) and then facing the barrage of questions about future plans from parents and in-laws and then later from friends on the entire story how it started, who proposed and how etc. Phew! Looking back at the last two years it feels good that all pieces of the jigsaw puzzle* fell in the right place, somehow. The engagement ceremony too was a good experience as I never knew I had so many relatives ha ha. That too when, only the close ones were invited for it. I dread the fact that I am going to have a tough time recalling names of everyone in the marriage reception and plus names of relatives from Neha’s side as well… sigh!

I am not sure if it is a good time or not but before the engagement or marriage one starts remembering all the excess… err ex-s and the crushes till date. The infatuations which we thought were true love and the gut feeling that no one in this world could make us part our ways. When I was mailing the invites for the engagement pics, I did send out the link to all such. I remember the girl from college with whom I always thought of getting married to. Looking back it makes me laugh because I hardly ever talked to her. Then there was this one from school days on whom I had what we call now a childish crush. That time I could never think of any other girl and was dead sure that she was the one for me. On seeing her mail after ages I did not think I would be glad to read that she is married and doing well; in fact I was happier that I am with Neha. There have been umpteen crushes and the fond memories (some not so fond) associated with it. Such is life and memories! Well the marriage is set for March and we would need all your good wishes for the future.

I just had a look at my archive section and found this post written a year back. Memories, I tell you :).

*At the mention of jigsaw puzzle I remembered a story book I got as a birthday gift from my parents. It had a nice image of a jigsaw puzzle land and a boy who sets out to solve the jigsaw mystery. I distinctly remember that I loved that book a lot, sadly mom gave it later to a cousin (who must have thrown it away after reading). Did I mention memories?